After great conversation about Defining Doofuses it was requested that a guy respond to the post. I asked my friend Everardo to weigh in. Here’s his unedited response…
LOL well I certainly wouldn’t suggest a sporting event for a first date. My preference would be to meet for a coffee or beer (yes if you don’t drink either then that also answers a lot for me). I don’t mind trading a few emails or even a phone call but <3 should be sufficient to have a meeting. I’m not looking for a penpal and I could probably fall in love with many people over email but I need to meet in person. I need to know that there is some chemistry between us and I’ve been duped enough by women using old profile photos, lying about their stats, etc (yes I know guys do this too) but when I first meet someone for a date I do want to talk. I want to hear and see your responses and how you act in public, are you socially awkward? Are you mean to service staff? Are you a sloppy drunk? So again I’m fine with a couple emails and a phone call but after that, we’ve got to meet. Oh and I probably wouldn’t call a woman sweetie on the first meet, I prefer to refer to her as a “hot piece of ……” LOL (I’m kidding of course, guys be a gentlemen)
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I have dated a bit, though I am more the marrying kind, think Liz Taylor and you have an idea what I’m talking about…
Being from the South, and currently living there, sweetie and honey are parts of our everyday language. Some time it’s an insult for example “Oh bless your heart sweetie I bet you thought it was okay to go to the store in your slippers” or a compliment “Sweetie you are just the cutest little thing I’ve ever seen” but usually it is just they way I talk. Also in the South being invited to an sporting event would be dangerous if you didn’t know for sure if you were talking to a Bama fan or an Auburn fan.
As a lady I was raised to not meet anyone in person unless you knew then, or someone in your family did. As for online, coffee or a drink is the best way, not a sporting event or a movie, too hard to talk and not dinner, too much committment. If someone doesn’t get the hint after you suggest something other than his suggestion, then he is not a gentleman and ladies don’t date men like that…
Young girls today need to remember to be ladies and maybe the doofuses will remember how to be gentlemen. My daughters would have blessed the doofuses out. (Another Southern term that sounds nince but really isn’t)
Great comments, Suzi! Thank you for the reminder that terms like “sweetie” may be common on conversation in parts of the country in which I am not familiar. As a CT/NY lady, I prefer not to be called sweetie – by a doofus or anyone else.
Best line: “If someone doesn’t get the hint after you suggest something other than his suggestion, then he is not a gentleman and ladies don’t date men like that..” AMEN!
I’m in complete agreement — you can completely tell everything (well, almost everything) about a person based on how they treat servers and such. A guy uses a coupon, is derisive to a waiter, doesn’t tip. That’s an immediate sign to scoot the doofus.
And yes, real gals should be drinking beers